Personal Interviews with My Kids

I have been conducting monthly personal interviews with my kids for 14 years. My oldest son is now 18, and I started this practice when he was four. Over the years, I’ve had several friends ask me how I do it, and I wanted to document and share my process.

I have varied my approach a bit over the years. I try to make it focused and sincere and not feel like a job interview or FBI interrogation.

While it’s not an exact science, this is the format I follow with my kids:

1 - Start with a prayer.

2 - Review the following list of questions and topics.

Highlights of last month.

What makes you happy?

What makes you sad?

What are you scared of?

What is your favorite food?

What is your favorite dessert?

Talk about friends.

What challenges are you going through?

Have you seen anything online that is inappropriate?

Ask about faith.

How are your prayers?

How is your scripture study?

Review goals from the previous month.

Set goals for the next month.

3 - End with a prayer and a hug. Tell my kids how proud I am of them and how much I love them.

I have a hardbound journal-type notebook specific for each one of my kids. I tend not to take notes during the conversation, but at the end, I will capture some of the highlights as best as I can. I specifically like it when we focus on goals, and I can follow up on the commitments from the previous month.

If you’re looking to implement something similar, my suggestion would be independent format. The goal is to have one-on-one time to connect with each child and give them a space to talk about what is going on in their lives.